Marriage

The right to choose one’s spouse is a fundamental human right, a women’s right as well as a man’s. Yet, for many years, women have been denied this right and forced into marriages without their consent.

This practice not only violates their human rights but also perpetuates gender inequality and undermines the principles of freedom, autonomy, and human dignity.

In many parts of the world, women are still subjected to forced marriages, child marriages, and other forms of arranged marriages that deprive them of the right to choose their spouses.

Women’s Right to Choose Their Spouse

In some cases, women are forced to marry against their will due to cultural or religious beliefs, economic circumstances, or family pressures.

This practice is not only a violation of their rights but also exposes them to numerous risks such as domestic violence, sexual abuse, and reproductive health problems.

The right to choose one’s spouse is enshrined in international human rights laws and treaties such as the Universal Declaration of Human Rights, the International Covenant on Civil and Political Rights, and the Convention on the Elimination of All Forms of Discrimination against Women (CEDAW).

These treaties recognize the right to marry and found a family as a fundamental human right and prohibit any form of coercion, discrimination, or violence in the context of marriage.

Women’s right to choose their spouses is essential for achieving gender equality and empowering women. When women have the freedom to choose their partners, they are more likely to enter into relationships based on mutual respect, love, and consent.

This, in turn, contributes to healthier and more fulfilling relationships, improved mental and physical health, and greater social and economic opportunities.

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Moreover, when women have the right to choose their spouses, they are more likely to exercise their other rights, such as education, employment, and political participation. This not only benefits women but also contributes to the overall development and progress of society.

To ensure that women’s right to choose their spouses is respected and protected, governments and other stakeholders must take concrete steps to eliminate forced marriages, child marriages, and other forms of arranged marriages.

This includes strengthening laws and policies that protect women’s right, increasing access to education and economic opportunities, and raising awareness about the harmful effects of forced marriages.

The Unforgettable Tale of Saima & Arshad

In the spring of 1996, the news was brimming with tales of love.  When Saima Waheed was a 20-year-old MBA student, she crossed paths with 27-year-old Arshad Ahmed.

Arshad was a tutor for Saima’s younger brother, and he visited their family home twice a week in the upscale neighbourhood of Model Town in Lahore. Despite seeing Arshad at the house, Saima had never met or spoken to him before.

Arshad worked as a lecturer at Pattoki Government College, earning a modest salary of 5,000 rupees ($17.75) per month. According to reports, Arshad’s father had a prior acquaintance with Ropri, Saima’s father, as they both worked in the same market in Lahore over a decade ago.

Saima, on the other hand, was the head girl at Lahore College for Women and a member of the debate team. Her father, Abdul Waheed Ropri, doted on her, providing her with a generous monthly allowance of 10,000 rupees (equivalent to $35.50 today) for both her expenses and her work at his pipeline manufacturing company. She had access to a mobile phone, credit cards, and a personal driver and car.

Saima and Arshad’s paths first crossed at a debate competition, after which they began talking on the phone. When Saima turned 21, Arshad proposed marriage, and his parents went to Saima’s home to seek her hand. However, Ropri had already arranged for Saima to marry her cousin when she was just 14 years old, but she refused to wear his ring and the engagement was called off. Later, her father accepted a proposal from a doctor who Saima had only met once at their engagement celebration, and who was 41 years old at the time. Saima realized she was in love with Arshad and begged the doctor to withdraw his proposal, but he refused.

Saima refused to be treated like a commodity to be sold to the highest bidder, as she expressed in an interview. In February 1996, she deceived her parents by claiming to collect some certificates from college and secretly met Arshad at a lawyer’s office where they signed a marriage contract called “nikkah.”

Just over a week later, Saima informed her parents about the marriage, which resulted in her father hitting her across the face – the first time he had ever laid a hand on her for exercising women’s rights.