Pakistani fashion model and actress Rubya Chaudhry took it to her Instagram to explain how the concept of ‘kismat’ is straight-up cruel for women of the subcontinent. Women have always been targeted under this cruel practice where whatever happens in their life is due to their ‘kismat’ – which is either unfortunate or commendable and, for some odd reason, always relies on a man.
She says, “The cruel concept of ‘kismet’ and how we as women of the subcontinent are held against its yardstick. Father wasn’t around: bad kismet, the husband, is a d**k: bad kismet, children are estranged (or there aren’t any): bad, bad, bad kismet.”
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“The woman does exceptionally well in her career and is deeply satisfied with her accomplishments, but didn’t marry or chose to not start a family for whatever reason, some phoppo, khaalaa, or cousin (or woman’s own mother) will continue to reiterate how the woman is a victim of bad kismet,” she added.
A woman’s mere role in life in the subcontinent is to get married and have kids. No other accomplishments in their lives are recognized in this part of the world. This makes happy and healthy women fall prey to discouragement. It is high time people change their mindset towards the other gender.
Chaudhry further speaks from her experiences, says, “This kind of thinking is designed to breed depression in an otherwise happy and healthy woman and should be discouraged. I’ve had countless arguments with my own family regarding this, and it’s clear that changing mindsets is far from a simple task. It gets to you, I know.. as it gets to me. But remember to be kind & gracious, because not enough people are.”
Chaudhry’s Instagram profile is rather filled with inspirational stories – more of a personal diary.
In another post, she speaks of the pursuit of happiness. She says, “I live a full life in my head. I do all the things I love to do in perfect time, no procrastinating, no loitering about feeling sorry for the time lost, for the opportunities wasted. It’s easy to dream, dream as big as I like. But applying myself practically, physically, meticulously to a small goal each day every day for as little as 10 minutes a day…that takes effort. And without effort, there will be no reward. And honestly… it isn’t even the reward I’m after; it’s literally just the pursuit which one finds is the reward in itself. So all it takes is to get outside my head to live a little.”
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We love healthy and happy women, such as Chaudhry herself! Here is to hoping that women will be free to lead extraordinary life roles in this part of the world.
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